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Couples who succeed are doing this

Why do some relationships thrive longterm and others fail?  This is a question so many individuals ask me.  For a couple to succeed longterm it makes a marked difference if each individual focuses, as much as possible, at being the best possible version of themselves. What do I mean by 'being the best possible version of themselves'? It is important to understand and learn what you can bring to the relationship.  If you focus on what you can bring then you become the solution to any crisis … [Read more...]

Are you overprotecting your partner?

Overprotecting your partner is one of the patterns of behaviour that help destroy a relationship. Many couples who come to me for help discover they have created this dynamic of overprotection for each other. Protection for each other is, of course, a good thing.  But when it becomes intrusive or overprotecting then problems can arise. Some overprotecting examples Women can become over-protectors.  When a woman does this it can feel normal and the right thing to do. However, ladies, by … [Read more...]

From disconnection to reconnection

Couples can easily get lost in their relationship.  If you do not feel valued within it then you will feel disconnected from it.  We all need to feel connected. When you feel your relationship is not working you will look to meet that connection elsewhere.  This is what happened to this couple.  In their case in the form of an affair. Affairs rarely solve the issues.  However by learning why the affair happened this couple turned their relationship around and learned how not only to reconnect … [Read more...]

Are your behaviours designed to attract your partner?

My question to you today is are you creating behaviours within you which will attract your partner? You see when you first meet you are!  In the beginning, you are in 'marketing mode'.  You want your partner to be attracted to you and so you create behaviours which will attract. You fall in love and believe that now nothing can possibly go wrong.  Well, actually you are wrong. Life can get in the way and behaviours can easily change What do I mean by life? Jobs Hobbies … [Read more...]

Intimacy dies over time – fact or fiction?

Many people believe that intimacy dies over time.  My question is who told you?  Yes, it can die over time - but it doesn't have to. Time is not necessarily the issue.  It's how your dynamic with your partner has changed from when you first met.  This is the responsibility of both of you. Time and again I hear from couples who seek my help that they have become friends rather than lovers.  The sexual connection has died and one or both feel they are now living with their best … [Read more...]