What happens to cause Relationship Breakdown?

The key triggers for men and women are different. The problem is most men and women in a relationship don't know this so each is spending an immense amount of effort attempting to convince their partner to their way of thinking.  This can, and often does, make matters worse. As I say Men and Women are Different, and I don't just mean physically! This is good news. The differences create lasting attraction - but only if the emotional needs of each are understood and honoured.  If they're not … [Read more...]

It’s too late

One of my clients said this to me the other day. She and her husband had separated and had been living separate lives for a couple of years.  But increasingly over several months she had been wondering if they'd done the right thing. She felt sure her partner had now established a new life, but  because of the children they'd remained in constant contact and were still friends. She still felt hurt by what had happened but didn't feel they'd done all they could to have sorted out their … [Read more...]

Now you’ve split – Are you asking yourself great questions?

This can be very difficult in the middle of a marriage break up. Many people find themselves in such a place of pain they don't know which way to turn or how to get out of the bleak hole they feel they are in. Part of the solution is to ask yourself great questions.  Now what do I mean by this? Well  asking questions like "Why do I feel like this?"   or "How come this has happened to me?"  won't give very good answers.  Yes you'll give yourself answers but not great ones.  Why?  Because … [Read more...]

A Break up doesn’t have to mean you breakdown

It's natural to feel a range of emotions when a marriage or significant relationship comes to an end. Especially if that end was sudden. You may find yourself experiencing a whole range of emotions  - as I've described before in earlier posts. It is important to look after yourself at times like this. Even if it's hard make sure you're eating enough.  Small amounts can often be easier than a full 3 course meal.  So snack through the day if you find meals difficult. Get some … [Read more...]

Breakups happen for a reason

Remember all relationship breakups happen for a reason.  I understand that this is a hard thing to face and one that can take time to come to terms with. What happened to all that love and passion you had when you were first together? How come it's all vanished? What did we do or not do to cause the breakup? These and many other questions can revolve round and round with no apparent solution - especially if you're the one who didn't want the relationship/marriage to end. Facing … [Read more...]