I need you because I love you

I need you because I love you is a world away, in relationship terms, from I love you because I need you.  Let me explain. I need you because I love you Here the prime driver is Love.  You need and want this person in your life because of your love for them.  The feeling of love you have created within yourself when you're with them brings you joy and strength. This applies to both sexes. For men, it brings strength and protection and the knowledge that as love is the driving force they … [Read more...]

Successful Couples are doing this…..

The question I often here in my sessions is how come other couples are successful and we aren't? My job in helping couples out of crisis and into being a successful couple is to give them the tools to change their behaviours and reactions to each other - in an environment which is safe for them. So today I'm going to give you a few pointers and hence the heading of today's post Successful Couples are doing this..... They have learnt and have practised being open with each other.  … [Read more...]

Confront your real issues

Today I'm going to discuss the need to confront your real issues. These are so often not what you think they are! This is not about who last did the shopping. Who left the top of the toothpaste. Who failed to pick up their clothes from the floor.  Or any of the other niggling irritating things we all do or fail to do some of the time! This is about getting to the core of what the real problems are.  The above list is just an example of what so many people home in on when life is not … [Read more...]

What makes you extraordinary?

We all have gifts, abilities and strengths -  there will be some thing you are brilliant at which leaves those around you in awe - but to you comes as 2nd nature! It's easy to see it in others isn't it!  The brilliant business man, the wonderful singer, the amazing actor.....   and it's also very easy to wish to be like them!   But the only difference between them and you is they found their passion and skill and threw themselves into it. But believe it or not they won't be good at … [Read more...]

Values and Needs

Regardless of your situation or the problems you feel you have, one of the most important things to find out is what your values are and how these are met. This is why I devote a great deal of time to assisting my clients to find out what theirs are.  Until they are clear on what their top values are then they have little chance of changing how they're feeling. Why?  Because they don't know how to! It may all seem rather confusing to begin with, but that's where we work together so the … [Read more...]