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Are you exhausted by your relationship?

So often couples end up in crisis as they have exhausted themselves going over and over the symptoms of their unique issues rather than learning and understanding the deeper causes of their problems. They continue to use the same behaviours and methods of communication which got them into the crisis in the first place, with the result that nothing changes. Having tired themselves out they look for the reason they're exhausted and decide the relationship is wrong and cannot be fixed.  After … [Read more...]

If your marriage is in crisis then acknowledge it and take action

The Emotional Stages you need to Experience as you invest in your Marriage and resolve your Marriage Crisis Just to be clear before I get into this post I refer throughout to marriage crisis.  I do this to avoid making each statement too long-winded or confusing.  These stages equally apply to anyone in a relationship crisis whether you are married or not. It is up to you how quickly you take these steps.  I know for most people it takes courage.  People can feel daunted, lost and a bit … [Read more...]

From disconnection to reconnection

Couples can easily get lost in their relationship.  If you do not feel valued within it then you will feel disconnected from it.  We all need to feel connected. When you feel your relationship is not working you will look to meet that connection elsewhere.  This is what happened to this couple.  In their case in the form of an affair. Affairs rarely solve the issues.  However by learning why the affair happened this couple turned their relationship around and learned how not only to reconnect … [Read more...]

Successful couples are doing this

Why do some couples succeed and others fail?  This is a question I am frequently asked by couples in my sessions.  Here are some examples of what successful couples are doing. Successful couples are doing this..... They have: Learnt and then practised being open with each other.  Even in times of stress. Never assumed their interpretation of the situation and how they feel is the same as their partner's. Avoided blaming each other. Made giving love more important than being … [Read more...]

You can’t expect your partner to think the way you do

For today's post I want you to think about how you communicate with your partner.  You see your partner will not think the way you do.   They won't know how you think either. As a result they won't communicate the way you do.  Especially in times of stress.  We are all individuals and each and every one of us has our own way of communicating anxiety, stress and upsets. Some people will go quiet.  Others will shout.  Some will giggle nervously!  We are all different.  We have all learnt how to … [Read more...]