It’s too late

One of my clients said this to me the other day. She and her husband had separated and had been living separate lives for a couple of years.  But increasingly over several months she had been wondering if they'd done the right thing. She felt sure her partner had now established a new life, but  because of the children they'd remained in constant contact and were still friends. She still felt hurt by what had happened but didn't feel they'd done all they could to have sorted out their … [Read more...]

Notice your small triumphs

It's the small things that matter in life.  Why? Because small successes will build into larger ones. This is particularly important when a person is caught up in the middle of an emotional crisis. It's too easy to feel that life is one long struggle with no end to the misery in sight. So easy to focus on all the negatives. But there will be small triumphs through the day which can easily be overlooked or ignored. Stop for a moment and count your achievements so far - either for … [Read more...]

Are you caring for you?

If you're in the middle of a traumatic upheaval it's very easy to forget to look after yourself.  To forget to do the things that you enjoy.  Your focus puts you in a place where all normal things 'go out of the window'. The trauma may be so great that you find you're unable to eat, unable to sleep, unable to think sensibly.  In fact you may find yourself huddled in a corner feeling like a wounded animal. These types of reaction are totally normal.  But it is important to do something … [Read more...]

Breakups happen for a reason

Remember all relationship breakups happen for a reason.  I understand that this is a hard thing to face and one that can take time to come to terms with. What happened to all that love and passion you had when you were first together? How come it's all vanished? What did we do or not do to cause the breakup? These and many other questions can revolve round and round with no apparent solution - especially if you're the one who didn't want the relationship/marriage to end. Facing … [Read more...]