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A willingness to learn and an open-minded focus saved this couple from divorce

I met this lovely couple a few months ago. His desire to understand and learn how to be there for his wife in the way she needed opened her up to new possibilities. His new focus helped her relax and feel safe to see new options and an exciting future with her husband. I am full of admiration for this couple who worked hard to understand each other at a deeper level and so give themselves what they both craved.  A close, connected relationship.  It's been a pleasure and a privilege to … [Read more...]

You are not your partner…..

You are not your partner so you can't know what they're thinking.  There is also a high percentage chance you don't understand why they say and do the things they do.  Add to this the fact that men and women communicate differently and your chances of interpreting their actions and words can be very low. Misinterpretation of your partner's wishes can lead you down the wrong path.  In some cases, I have seen couples create a completely wrong lifestyle as each person attempts to meet what they … [Read more...]

From disconnection to reconnection

Couples can easily get lost in their relationship.  If you do not feel valued within it then you will feel disconnected from it.  We all need to feel connected. When you feel your relationship is not working you will look to meet that connection elsewhere.  This is what happened to this couple.  In their case in the form of an affair. Affairs rarely solve the issues.  However by learning why the affair happened this couple turned their relationship around and learned how not only to reconnect … [Read more...]

Are your behaviours designed to attract your partner?

My question to you today is are you creating behaviours within you which will attract your partner? You see when you first meet you are!  In the beginning, you are in 'marketing mode'.  You want your partner to be attracted to you and so you create behaviours which will attract. You fall in love and believe that now nothing can possibly go wrong.  Well, actually you are wrong. Life can get in the way and behaviours can easily change What do I mean by life? Jobs Hobbies … [Read more...]

Intimacy dies over time – fact or fiction?

Many people believe that intimacy dies over time.  My question is who told you?  Yes, it can die over time - but it doesn't have to. Time is not necessarily the issue.  It's how your dynamic with your partner has changed from when you first met.  This is the responsibility of both of you. Time and again I hear from couples who seek my help that they have become friends rather than lovers.  The sexual connection has died and one or both feel they are now living with their best … [Read more...]