We all have habits of behaviour – are yours creating a good dynamic?

Every adult will have habits of behaviour which they have developed over the years by the experiences life has given them through their childhood to where they are now. Habits which have been created to protect them or give them the outcome they believe is best for them in the past.  The problem is that some of these habits,which  I so often hear individuals say are "The way I am",  may not be serving them in the way they believe is best. "The way I am" now doesn't have to be "The Way I … [Read more...]

When is it safe to change?

Doing or behaving differently to the way you have before can seem impossible.  Right!  So when is it safe to change? Or more importantly when will you feel safe to change?  Couples can so easily get stuck in patterns of behaviour that actually don't work.  They don't meet each other's needs and do not create any harmony.  None of those wonderful feelings you both had when you first met. Each individual hangs on to their way of behaving, doing  or wanting something - usually because it's … [Read more...]

Don’t let a relationship breakup destroy your life

Some  breakups are mutual agreed.  Both of you want out as the saying goes. But more frequently this is not the case. One wants to go and the other doesn't. If the relationship breakup is sudden then the one taken by surprise can go into emotional breakdown.  That feeling that something has struck you down - you feel wounded but there are no signs of physical damage. Your feelings ricochet from hating them, wanting them back, still loving them, not understanding why this has happened, … [Read more...]

The festive season can be stressful

Some of you, I am sure, will be breathing a sigh of relief that the festive season is over, especially if your relationship is going through a bad patch or you are in the midst of wondering if you should really be together.  The stress is over. January has a reputation for being the month when more marriages break up than in any other month.   Often couples hang on until after the festive break, either for the sake of a partner they didn't want to hurt at this time, or for the sake of the … [Read more...]

Is fear destroying your relationship?

Fear can turn a normally loving person into someone totally different.  They can start behaving in ways they've never behaved before and not how they would normally act. Gone is the loving, kind and gentle person you knew and now you're faced with someone you don't recognise. If your relationship is having problems then one or both of you is probably scared. Being scared is also being in fear Fear of so many things - especially the future.  To protect yourself emotionally you may just … [Read more...]