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A willingness to learn and an open-minded focus saved this couple from divorce

I met this lovely couple a few months ago. His desire to understand and learn how to be there for his wife in the way she needed opened her up to new possibilities. His new focus helped her relax and feel safe to see new options and an exciting future with her husband. I am full of admiration for this couple who worked hard to understand each other at a deeper level and so give themselves what they both craved.  A close, connected relationship.  It's been a pleasure and a privilege to … [Read more...]

Will Marriage Coaching save my marriage?

Clients arriving for their initial session with me frequently ask me "Will marriage coaching save my marriage?" The short answer is Yes and No! Does Coaching always bring a couple back together? No, not always. If the relationship is not supposed to last then it won't.  Not all relationships should. Some couples arrive expecting some kind of miracle with very little involvement from them. The coach doesn’t have a magic wand! It also doesn’t work if the person or couple being coached … [Read more...]

Clinging to negative events might stop a positive future

Consider the title of this post.  Are you clinging to a negative event in your past?  If so what effect is it having on your future? People make mistakes In fact, it is said we learn the most when we fail, get it wrong or make a mistake. People also make mistakes in their interpretation of others' mistakes.  However, they cling to their interpretation and make it their truth. In a way it can keep themselves "safe".  This safety is a protection mechanism. It allows you to blame your … [Read more...]

Do you have the confidence needed to repair your relationship?

Today I want to connect with the couples who want to find out how to create the confidence to repair their relationship. Let me explain. It takes confidence and a strong desire to fix a relationship that is suffering or 'on the ropes'.  Many people are scared to do this.  Scared they could be wrong and that 'someone' is going to tell them so and 'tick them off'.  This stops a great number of people (couples and individuals) from seeking help.  Time and again I am told by clients that they … [Read more...]

How can I experience more love?

"How can I experience more love with my partner in this moment of conflict"? This is not a question many of the couples I see ever ask themselves.  They go into a place of pain and hurt and in many cases do the opposite. Rather than find out and, maybe, let go of the pain they are experiencing, they go to a place where they behave badly.  They seek revenge.  Maybe they retaliate.  They withdraw.  They lay down the law according to their perception of the situation of how they're feeling or … [Read more...]