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Be totally committed to your partner

When couples first get married they exchange vows, they commit and then quite often they let life take over.

I’d like you to consider whether you are doing this in your marriage.  If you are then also consider would you do this in other aspects of your life?

Do you also do this at work?  Or do you have a goal?  A career goal.  Did you have a plan when you first started work that was going to improve your salary and your working life?  It might have been a goal to become a supervisor or manager or trainer. Whatever it doesn’t matter. But deep inside you, you proabably had some intention other than just to role up each day, work and then go home!  And if you did have a plan then you’ve probably been taking steps and actions to make sure you achieve what you want.

So what about your marriage?  Have you created a shared goal?  One which you are both focussed on.  One which will keep you together as a partnership – come what may!

It could be as simple as ensuring that when you hit problems you agree to resolve them together, to listen to each other’s issues and then to find ways together to resolve them whilst still respecting and loving each other’s differences.

Letting life take over and adopting an action plan which mainly relies on hope – hope that time will resolve the issue –  is a risky strategy.  Why?  Well for starters the issues probably won’t go away and secondly neither of you will have learnt much from what you went through.

There’s a good chance that niggling resentments will start to creep in to how you feel.  Once this happens it’s all too easy to collect evidence for future resentments.  Now you’re building a nice pile of resentments and starting to overlook the good in each other.

So how about taking a long hard look at where you are now and deciding, right now, that you’re going to look for the good in your partner and if  you’re finding that a bit difficult, then decide to become totally committed and passionate about rebuilding what you had on that day when you first committed to your marriage.

Become the driving force for building and growing this partnership.

This doesn’t mean you must control. Each of you is an equal partner, with individual needs and strengths.  But sometimes it needs one of you to press the ignition and fire up the passion once more.  The passion to create a long-lasting, loving partnership.

I realise that may appear easier said than done.  After all if you’re reading this the chances are you’re not as happy as you should be right now.

All I ask is you give it a go.  And if you don’t know how then get in touch.