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How do you deal with the aftermath of a difference of opinion

How you deal with the aftermath of a difference of opinion - or argument  - will have a major effect on the state of your relationship. If arguments never seem to get anywhere or become more and more frequent then you need to find out why.  Solving your issues may seem impossible.  They probably … [Read more...]

For Couples in Crisis: Have you lost sight of the Positives

When a relationship is in crisis couples can easily lose sight of any positives.  The issue here is one of focus.  When in crisis it is all too easy only to focus on the negatives. The problem is if you focus on the negatives - be that behaviours, problems, issues or emotions - that is what you … [Read more...]

Control is never the answer

Many couples who come to see me looking for answers to their relationship problems complain that one of them has become a controller.  Control is never the answer. This applies to both men and women - so it is by no means the norm these days to hear the woman say she is being controlled by her … [Read more...]

Relationship Tip: Give What They Need

Many couples I see tell me they are unable to give love to each other. However they still have feelings for each other.  They've developed patterns of behaviour which neither likes. The couple have created a stalemate. Neither is prepared to give until they see some effort by their partner.  But … [Read more...]

How do you get from pain to happiness

One of the frequent questions I get asked by couples is how do we get from pain to happiness.  What did we do to end up here? I see many couples and individuals who tell me one thing only to focus on the opposite. "I want to be closer to my partner" "I want to let go of the pain" "I want … [Read more...]