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Notice something new about your partner

Today I want you to notice something new about your partner.  Something you LOVE

Why?

Well it is so easy to become lazy about who we are with. To fail to notice the special things in life.

Notice something new about your partner

I’d like you to look at your partner and remind yourself what you love about them.   It could be how they sit or stand.  How they use their hands when they speak.  Facial expressions – maybe one eyebrow goes up more than the other when they talk. It doesn’t matter what it is but start to become aware or remind yourself of things you’ve either forgotten or never really noticed before.

Observe – don’t stare!   Appreciate your new discoveries.  You can share them if you like.

Notice how you speak to your partner

…. And how they speak to you.

Not just the words.

So much of how we communicate is through body language (how we stand, our facial expression. etc..) and the tone of voice we use.  These two aspects are more important than the actual words.

If you sound angry then your partner is likely to be on red alert to defend or justify their actions and can easily miss your real intention.

If you use kindness and care to express yourself – even when things are wrong you will improve the opportunity to be heard.  Your partner will feel in a safer place to listen and understand.

I know this is all easy when life is going well and very hard when it isn’t.  However one of the biggest problems couples face is in how they communicate.

We all want to be heard and understood.  However if you are feeling hurt or angry then it is easy to resort to patterns of behaviour which don’t solve the problem.  Often they make matters worse.

By training yourself to notice how you speak, how you communicate and how to improve both of those then you open the door to better communication.

Remember if you are in pain the chances are your partner is as well.

Notice how to help them by doing something new.