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What is your inner voice telling you?

Your inner voice has a powerful effect on how you live your life. For some people it is that part of them which is telling them they are a failure or not good enough, or mostly wrong.   Maybe that part which says "I am who I am and I can't change." For them it can be so powerful they become stuck and unable to see a way out. To avoid action it tells them: they must be loved 'warts and all'. This inner voice is harsh.  Harsher than you would speak to any friend, acquaintance, … [Read more...]

Do You Set Yourself Up for Failure or Success?

Whether you set yourself up for failure or success is surprisingly easy. (And you may not know you're doing it).  You may think you are determined to succeed only to find you let yourself down.  The question is what's going on within you to cause you to fail when you believe, consciously, that your desire is to succeed? Couples I see in my sessions work hard to achieve success with each other.  They practice the tools and strategies I give them.  They commit in a heartfelt way to continue … [Read more...]

New Year – New Opportunities

New Year's Resolutions are dominating the press right now so my post today is on this subject. Most of us view the New Year as an opportunity to take action in an area of our lives which we believe needs improvement or would like to change.  To lose weight, get fitter, gain weight, give up smoking, cut down on alcohol, improve our relationship with our partner...  The list is endless and depends on you and your desires. The problem is that unless we replace the habit or behaviour we want … [Read more...]

From tailspin to exciting future

I had the privilege of working with Mark over the last 3 months. Mark had become someone that he didn't particularly like in his attempts to rescue his marriage.  As a result his marriage had failed.  In the time he spent with me Mark has transformed his life and is now living his life as he should.  He has given himself challenges and has already succeeded in several. He has been kind enough to let me know about his experience and share it with you: I was in a very dark place when I found  … [Read more...]

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

"Should I stay or should I go?" is a question I frequently get asked during a client's first session. They know they're not happy but the upheaval of a split seems more than they can deal with.  The consequences for the household seem overwhelming - so now they're stuck. Stuck in a marriage that feels wrong. A place where they feel unfulfilled and lost.  They've become someone they don't particularly like but home still feels safe.  It may not be all they want but the unknown of leaving looks … [Read more...]