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Can our Broken Marriage be Saved?

I see couples with many different problems in my sessions.  Often they come to me in a last ditch attempt to find out if their broken marriage can be saved.  Frequently they have tried other forms of counselling before giving themselves one last shot.

Most have lost sight of who they are and why they are with their spouse. As a result they are each focussing on their own particular needs and not those of their partner. This leads to

  • endless arguments
  • loss of connection
  • stalemate
  • loss of who they are
  • no hope for any sort of joint future
  • feeling miserable, unhappy, hurt, misunderstood………..

So what do I do in my sessions?

Each couple is unique and their situation is unique so I don’t have a ‘one-size fits all’ programme.  However there are some basics which I work through with each couple which enable them to understand and learn how to re-focus on what matters to them as a couple and as people in their own right.  We work together to discover your  true sense of self to enable each of you to be who you truly are meant to be.  This helps you both understand how each of you works and how you each see the world.

You are then in a position to learn about each other’s needs and how you can meet them.  This in turn removes the fear of feeling under-valued. By learning and practising these steps we move towards discovering the truth from a position of safety and security. Trust can be rebuilt from here – no matter what has happened in the past.  By developing your emotional muscles you release so many more opportunities for dealing with issues now and in the future.  From here you can plan a future that’s right for you both.

I agree that not all couples are compatible or should stay together but so many part for the wrong reasons and have regrets later.   So many have never found out what might have been.

Don’t let that be you.