Is your blueprint for life giving you what you want?

Most of us will have created our vision of how life should be.  However, problems arise when life isn’t the way we believe it should be.  When it doesn’t match our vision; a vision created, in some cases, many years before.  Call this a blueprint if you like.

When this happens you have several choices:

Fight for your Blueprint

You can fight to change reality to match your vision.    If your partner is not behaving in the ways you believe they should then one way to get your blueprint vision back on track is to tell them to change.  This is unlikely to be successful.  After all, their vision on how life should be is probably different to yours.  It is likely to have different requirements and needs.

Men and women have different desires and needs within a relationship.

Do nothing

From this place you can feel stuck.  You may feel there is no way out and have a desire to run, hide, or put up and shut up, This isn’t really a solution. The issue here is nothing much gets solved.

Revisit your Blueprint

As I said at the beginning of this post you probably created your blueprint some time ago. Right now it may need updating.

Hollywood is very good at creating a blueprint for us on how marriage should be.  At the end of the movie, we see the couple go off hand in hand into the sunset to live happily ever after.

What we don’t see is how they’re getting on a few years down the line!

If your blueprint for your relationship is that love and passion should always be there without effort then you may need to revisit this view.

We all need growth in our lives and this includes relationships – and so by definition this requires you to revisit your blueprint from time to time.

How to update your Blueprint

Question what it gives you and how to open it up to some flexibility.  This will automatically give it growth and will offer you more choices for the future.

In so many cases the reason people don’t get what they want in life is they put the onus for success on their partner.  They have rules the other one must meet for them to feel happy.

Now you are focusing on the wrong thing.

By changing your focus and adapting your blueprint to encompass your partner’s needs as well your own, you are creating a team and a joint vision for your future.

Find you about your partner’s blueprint

Now imagine if two people in a marriage both have restrictive, or rigid, blueprints – not only for themselves but also for each other.  Life will be mediocre at best and since neither is challenging their perceived truth, neither will be truly connecting with the other or themselves.

These limiting beliefs can be challenged and then changed. The future can be different and more exciting than how you perceive it right now.