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Beliefs are frequently built on feelings – this may not be knowledge

When a marriage or relationship is failing the two people involved are often not in the same place at the same time.  What do I mean by this?  Well one person may have decided they no longer love their partner, whilst the other is still feeling a strong emotional bond.

For the one who is still feeling close they believe that the relationship can survive.  The one who believes the relationship is dead can now withdraw even more.  Why?

Well there are many reasons.  A common one is they don’t want to give their partner false hope and so to make their point they close themselves down from the relationship even more than before.

Many individuals believe their relationship has died – but do they know?

By creating a belief that your relationship has died you will now live by that belief.  A belief is created by the emotions you are feeling.  Your belief justifies your feelings.  But beliefs are not knowledge.  Knowledge only comes with facts.  With knowledge and facts comes wisdom.

Are your beliefs giving you the wrong answer

Couples who attend my sessions are helped to untangle these issues and discover whether their beliefs are serving them in the best way.  I work with each of them to find knowledge and truth behind the issues they have experienced and how to solve them by meeting their needs as individuals and as a couple.

Relationships struggle for a myriad of reasons.  Beneath these reasons are the needs of each person.  If these are not being met in the way they need to be then problems surface and beliefs are created to protect them from further pain.

By gaining knowledge the couple have the facts.  By using the tools I teach them they have the tools to keep hold of the facts. They have the ability to help and understand each other at a much deeper level and to solve issues together.

Before you decide to ‘throw in the towel’ it is important to have the right knowledge.  It would sad to look back in a few months or years time and realise you hadn’t had the facts at the time and now regret your decision.